EVER MEET SOMEONE who makes you feel small? Someone putting on a show to scare, control, or impress you.
The Back Story
That is fake fierceness. Think of it as playground behavior in grown-up clothes.
It’s not about solving problems.
- It’s about looking powerful and making others feel small.
Spot The Signs
These people rely on a few key moves.
Their body language might make you feel crowded.
- They stand too close, move slowly on purpose, or use big “look at me” gestures.
Their speech is often sharp.
- Full of fancy words
- Delivered in a loud “I know better” tone
And their actions?
- Showing off
- Making decisions in public
- Turning ordinary moments into center stage performances.
Sound familiar?
- Same kids. Bigger bodies. Better clothes.
Power Moves
Fake fierceness comes in many forms.
- Big gestures, loud voices, or even blocking your path—all meant to intimidate.
- They want compliance, or at least silence, without needing violence.
The goal is to make you feel unsure, embarrassed, or small.
Where does it happen? Everywhere.
- At work, in politics, at school.
- Anywhere someone wants control or to shut others down.
Why They Do It
There’s usually a method behind the madness.
- Many are hiding insecurity, boosting their confidence with volume.
- Some just want to stay in control.
Many create tension to distract everyone from the real issues at hand.
Win Without Hype
Here’s the good news: you don’t have to play along. See through the act and maintain your power.
- Stay calm
- Keep your focus
- Take a stand
Relationship Reset
When tension rises at home, fake fierceness often shows up disguised as “assertiveness”.
Situation: Ryan raises his voice during disagreements and leans in close.
- Before: Emma backs down just to end it.
- After: She sees the performance. Emma stays calm and says what she needs to say.
Tip: Stand your ground.
Own Your Voice
In the workplace, the loudest person often tries to control the room.
Situation: Jason dominates meetings with big gestures and louder opinions.
- Before: Mia stays quiet to avoid conflict.
- After: She pauses, then shares her point clearly and directly.
Tip: Pause. Then speak clearly.
Lead Without Drama
In community spaces, drama can hide behind the mask of leadership.
Situation: Tim turns every community meeting into his personal spotlight.
- Before: Others pull back. He fills the room.
- After: Sofia calmly redirects the conversation to the shared goal.
Tip: Call it out calmly. Refocus the goal.
Tips and Techniques
Fake fierceness is everywhere. The playground never really closed.
- Every time you refuse to support their performance, they lose power.
When the drama starts, don’t join the show.
Remember: Stand calm. Stay quietly unshakable.